Overheard at Rite Aid

Mother to her 5 or 6 year old son: "No, honey, I'm not going to get you another whoopie cushion."
-RMA

Moving on

In the library, standing on a stool near the high shelves, African American girl around seven talking to her father.
Girl:"......Dwight D. Eisenhower, John F. Kennedy, Lyndon B. Johnson, Richard Nixon, Gerald Ford, George H....W....Bush, Bill Clinton, George Bush."
Dad: "Obama, I think Obama is going to be moving into a new house."
Girl: "Do you mean the White House?"
Dad: "Yes, I think Obama's going to be moving into the White House."

Hazards of staying up too late to watch the debates

Man: "Last night I dreamt that I was at a party and Obama was there and he wanted me to ask him a question. I asked about the space program. While he was telling me his plan to launch a rocket to Mars I realized I was completely naked."
-MEC

Our lives should all be so stressful

Middle school girl: "I don't get nearly enough homework, it's really rather stressful."

Don't ask

Overheard on campus, two girls talking: "You call your boyfriend a golden brown crunchy nugget?"

Not overheard, but...

Another poetic missed connection on Craig's List: If I saw you somewhere else, may be I do not care, but I saw you in front of Aldi..., you put a bag full of grocery over your shoulder and rode a bike away, at the moment I felt I knew you for years, you did not look around so I think you did not see me, everything happened in less than 10 seconds....This was sometime ago during a sunny summer day, but your tall, healthy and energetic back imagine and your assertive, gentle and scholarly look has been always a mystery in my mind, you are around 6' tall, fit, 30ish or younger, brown hair, green bag and a nice bike which I do not remember the color. I do not expect you to reply even you see this message, I do not want to disturb your life, but I do wish to let you know that your natural non-abrasive and unassuming manner has unconsciously impressed someone deeply, thanks for the beautiful imagine, and have a nice fall break.