Life imitates art?

At the Ithaca Farmer's Market.
Man, looking at a little pear shaped tomato: "These are cute. They look like...thought bubbles."

Exactly

Teen boy: "I'm not really a boy. I'm not really a man. I guess I'm a guy."

All the wrong places

Along route 13 past the no-star motels. Girl: "These look like the kind of motel you'd go to to get murdered."

Ready for anything

At Stewart Park on a lovely summer evening.
Woman:"No thanks, we already have a shaman lined up."

That might explain politics...

Guy: "Have you ever noticed that people who are not-so-bright always seem to think they are smarter than everyone else?"

Ape uprising?

Woman: "I've never felt the same about monkeys after that chimp ripped off the woman's face. I guess they are tired of being funny and cute."

Must be true then

Teen girl: "Mom, you are the most embarrassing mother on earth. All my friends agree."

An educational experience

 A dad is reading a letter about studying abroad.
Father: "Founded by Dwight D. Eisenhower...yeah, he found it in his trash. This is one of those things that you send your kids off to and you never see them again because they get sold into slavery."

Not nearly enough

Girl:"How much would we save if we used hair to floss our teeth instead of dental floss?"

Natural attraction

Mother of a teenage girl:"She would walk the entire Appalachian Trail if there were stores all along it."

Insight

Teen girl: "College must be really hard."
Teen boy: "That's why they drink a lot....and fail."

Isn't that cheating?

Two women at lunch, talking about their boss.
Woman: "He always looks so well dressed, so well put together."
Coworker: "I learned his secret. He buys whatever the mannequin at the store is wearing so it's all coordinated."