Sweet

Girl to her parents: "You always say I'm spoiled rotten but sometimes the almost rotten fruit is the sweetest."

Like bees to honey?

Two tween girls talking about earrings: "No offense, but I'd never wear hoops because I've heard they attract boys."
-RA

We just don't see it either

Female student on cellphone: "Dude, why is everyone getting their eyes checked so friggin much?"

Paying attention in school

Overheard in Family and Consumer Science class:
Teacher: Does everyone know what a brassiere is?
Boy: Yeah, we learned about it in social studies.
Teacher: ????
Girl: That's a VIZIER.
Boy: Oh.

-OL

Herbal remedy

Looking at medicinal herbs at Oasis:
"I need some pigroot."
"Pigroot? What is that for?"
"So I don't eat like a pig"

-PS

Tough choices

Adolescent boy: "I don't know if I want to go to Heaven or Hell. In Heaven you have everything you want but Cerberus is in Hell and that's what I really want."

Leave it to your imagination

Girl eating ice cream at Purity: "What is this green thing in my hairnet?"

We blinked too

Young woman at Pizza Aroma:
"And then he put that glaucoma thing in my eye and I said NO WAAAY! and blinked"

Name that tune

Small boy at the library:
MAMA WHERE'S THE PASTA!
MAMA WHERE'S THE PASTA!
MAMA WHERE'S THE PASTA!

-RMA

Pets, keep watching out!

At Greenstar - woman showing pictures on her phone to someone: "And this is my cat dressed as a fairy."

Pets, watch out!

Dinner guest: "We don't eat meat very often and we never cook it at home, but when the pet food starts looking good it's time to have some meat."

First impressions

Man talking to woman: "That's the first thing that comes to mind when people think of you: Rocky Mountain oysters."

Yum

A girl: I like to wear pink and brown because I look like a chocolate covered strawberry.