Sunday, February 28, 2010

Yet more Olympics!

Woman watching men's figure skating: "I don't understand how he can make all those jumps without having any butt at all."

Saturday, February 27, 2010

More Olympics!

Woman: "Jasey Jay Anderson? Is that his real name?"
Other woman: "Canadians don't take fake names."

Friday, February 26, 2010


Girl watching curling on TV: "Why do they show it in slow-mo?"

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Snow Day!

A guy is trying to get his car out from the snow where it is stuck. The car has bald tires.
A passerby, stopping to watch: "You need to get snow tires."
A neighbor out shoveling: "You need to get snow tires."
The guy continues to try and get the car out. A snow plow goes by.
The driver leans out and says: "You need to get snow tires."

Sunday, February 21, 2010

An overheard we will always wonder about ....

At Ithaca Bakery.
Woman: "At first I thought it was something stuck in my teeth, and I started pulling it out and pulling it out and then I realized it was coming from the roof of my mouth....."

Truth in advertising

Not overheard, but:
T--shirt seen on a man shopping at Greenstar (who was also wearing unmatched shoes): "No longer naked"

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Small girl: "I used to be, like, so afraid of video games."

Friday, February 19, 2010

Quick change artist

Two kids at daycare conversing over lunch -

Eight year old boy: "When we were leaving, my dog puked in the driveway! It had corn in it!"
Seven year old girl: "Ewww, one time my dog puked....."
Adult: "OK! That's enough! Can we please talk about nice things during lunch?"
Eight year old boy: "Like what?"
Seven year old girl: "Like RAINBOWS AND MAGICAL PONIES!!!!!"


Thursday, February 11, 2010

So long as you don't try and use them...

Woman:"If you can't find your car keys - its OK"
Other woman: "If you look at your car keys and don't know what they are - there might be something wrong."

While over at Tim Horton's in Geneva..

Elderly lady:"She just put something in his margarita..... blah blah blah... put it in the freezer... blah blah blah...she killed him!"
Other elderly lady: "She's in her nineties now!"


Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Not overheard, but show us the way...

From Ithaca Craig's List:
your'e not gonna believe this but i think i found a way to a paralelle universe also found a way to to prove the existance of life after death all tied together. just wish i could alk to some cornell scientist to discuss my findings can any one tell me who to talk to at cornell? yes i realize how it sounds but given a decent chance this could really work. and no i'm not drunk nor do i do drugs of any kind !!! and i'm not mental that should cover all the negative replies i just had an idea and you won't believe how much sense it makes

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Gearing up for Valentine's Day?

On campus, two girls walking down the hall.
Girl:"If anyone kisses him or TOUCHES him or ANYTHING they're going to die a horrible death from DISEASE."

Thursday, February 4, 2010

College student: “My appetite really expands when things are free.”

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Good question

Teen: "Was someone really high when they created Groundhog Day or something?"